A letter from Esmeralda:

                    If you or someone in your family have lost a baby to Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, I would like to extend my deepest sympathy.  You have joined a club that none of us ever wanted to join and one that tragically grows every day.

                    All of us already in the club know what you are going through. We too have felt the same crippling pain, the same debilitating sorrow, the constant sadness and ever-flowing tears.  The loss of a child is not a wound that heals in time; it is, rather, dismemberment. 

                   If you have recently been bereaved, you have come to the right place, get in touch with us and a peer parent will call you.  Although you may find it impossible to believe at the moment, in time you will feel better.  The road to recovery is a long, rocky one, we know.  At times you may feel that the worst is behind you, only to find yourself taking a few steps backward the next day.  But in time the steps forward will take you further, and all along the way we can hold your hand, help you steady your walk when you falter. If you like we can post a photograph of your baby on this page.

Esmeralda Williamson-Noble

Gone from sight

I am standing on the seashore.  A ship in the bay lifts her anchor, spreads her white sails to the morning breeze and starts upon the ocean.

She is an object of great beauty and strength, and I stand and watch her until she hangs like a speck of white cloud just where the sea and sky mingle with each other.  Then someone at my side says, ""There she is gone!"" Gone where?  Gone from sight, that is all.  Just at that moment there are other eyes watching her coming and other souls taking up the glad shout,  "There she's coming!"

Telephone us,  e-mail us.  You will always be sure of finding someone who understands through Considering Alexander

Russian
Windflower (adonis
vernalis)

Poppy-flowered Windflower (anemone coronia)

Grief

Grief cannot be shared, for it is mine alone.
Grief is a dying within me,
A great emptiness,
A frightening void.
It is a loneliness,
A sickening sorrow at night,
On awakening a terrible dread.
Another's words do not help.
A reasoned argument explains little
For having tried too much.
Silence is the best response to another's grief.
Not the silence that is a pause in speech,
Awkward and unwanted,
But one that unites heart to heart.

Love, speaking in silence, is the way into
The void of another's grief.
The best of all loves comes silently,
And slowly too, to soften the pain of grief,
And begin to dispel the sadness,
It is the love of God, warm and true,
Which will touch the grieving heart and heal it.

He looks at a grieving person and has pity,
For grief is great pain.
He knows.  He understands.
Grief will yield to peace -  in time.


Alexander

And now where are you? 
Are you where the sea meets the sky?  In the clouds floating by? 
With the winds stroking the trees outside our house?
Where should I look?

How did you know your way? 
Did an Angel take you there, was it a long journey and were you scared?  Was God there to welcome you?

It used to br my job looking after you.  From when you first came into this world, it was I who kept you warm, who cuddled you to sleep.

It was to me that you gave your first smile.  Your eyes would scan my face to learn about me, your mother.  My love you knew already and for the rest we needed time.

I would have told you about the trees, the birds and the clouds.  I would have helped you play with blocks.  A bump on the head I could have kissed better, a broken toy we could have mended: your timid steps I could have steadied, if you were hungry I would have fed you.

Why did you leave so quietly I didn't hear?  None of my kisses made you better, wrapping you did not take away the cold.

Can you hear me when I cry? 
Can you see me when I struggle, when my steps are not so steady and I want to scream at you  "Why did you have to go?" 
Could you not at least come into my dreams, could you not show me where you live?

Then suddenly I know that you are always near, our love has only grown stronger: overcome the boundaries of death, everlasting. 
Not like life on earth.

And so, when it is time for me to come home, will you take me there?

-  Alexander's mummy

Remember her at www.geocities.com/rosejune2401



Crystal 'Sheyenne' Valentine-Gripp
Remember her at www.legacymanor.com



Georgia Ann Cook Fowlar
Remember her at www.geocities.com/cookybr549



Brandon Lee Leonard Dazey
Remember him at www.angelfire.com/ny5/ingodshands0/brandonleeleonarddazey.html



Bailey Madison "Maddie" Hammonds
Born December 21, 2001; called by angels March 31, 2002.
Remembered by Adam, Felicia & Jordan Hammonds



Chloe Grace "Gracie" Statzer
Born April 17, 2001; called by angels August 3, 2001. Remember her at
www.sidsinfo.com/lynn and www.geocities.com/angel_chloegrace



Alexander Charles Gill
Born June 8, 2001, he gained his wings on August 12, 2001.
Remember Alexander at:
www.babiesonline.com/babies/m/my_angel_alex and
www.sidsfamilies.com/families/alex.shtml